har har...

The Real RIAA Story...

] The World Beard and Moustache Championships will take
] place in Carson City, Nevada, on November 1, 2003.
] %uFEFFA panel of distinguished judges will determine
] which beards and moustaches in seventeen separate
] categories merit their owners the championship trophies
] and the coveted world champion titles. Special prizes
] will also be awarded to the youngest contestant, the
] contestant who traveled the farthest to attend, and the
] people's favorite.

Pack your bags kids, and throw away the razor!

World Beard and Moustache Championships Carson City 2003

] Washington, D.C. - The United States Postal Service
] surprised citizens and lawmakers today by filing
] thousands of lawsuits against netizens with active e-mail
] addresses. Under the Digital Millennium Copyright Act,
] the use of e-mail violates the government-approved
] monopoly the USPS currently enjoys.

Another good piece of satire from BBSpot.

BBspot - USPS Sues Internet Users

] It's a go: Adbusters' Unbrand America TV Spot is poised
] to hit the airwaves. We've wrangled a 30-second chunk of
] national airtime. More than half a million tubes, all
] ours. Watch it- with everyone else tuned to CNN- Monday,
] September 22, around 4:30 EST.
]
]
] To get this far has been serious work. For months we've
] been stonewalled. Sure, we shopped our Black Spot to the
] usual suspects at NBC, CBS, ABC, FOX. We even tried MTV.
] "We don't deal in free speech," chorused the networks.
] Check out all the sorry details here.
]
]
] Sadly, the response was expected. In the land of the
] free, the business of censorship is booming.
]
]
] Well, Adbusters isn't buying in. Keep your eyes peeled
] over the next few months. Plans are in the works for a
] big pushback. The agenda: Media Democracy.

Unbrand America

] Student cuts off penis and tongue after drinking
] hallucinogenic tea

Just say no

] You may think your salary is paltry, but compared with
] most of the world's population, you're up there with Bill
] Gates.

don't forget how good you have it!

Westerners Pretty Rich

] Los Angeles, CA - The RIAA announced that they would
] begin a strategy of profits by lawsuit, which should keep
] them a viable business indefinitely.
]
] "It's really a bold new idea that really gets back to the
] roots of the RIAA," said new RIAA Chairman and CEO Mitch
] Bainwol. "We'll no longer be worried about distributing
] music. The file sharers will do that for us, but now
] we'll just make our money from suing them and that's
] really what we're all about."
]
] According to a report by The Inquirer it will take the
] RIAA over 2,000 years to sue every file sharer, which
] confirms the long-term viability of the business model.

BBspot - RIAA Says Future of Music is Suing File Sharers

Please keep in mind that these are static jpgs...
Hold onto your seat...

Freak out man!!!

] The photograph to the right is JESUS, The Hot Air Balloon
] as it appeared at Ridgecrest, California on November 7th,
] 1998.

in the words of Mike Morrison, "He is risen!"

JESUS, The Hot Air Balloon

] New York, NY - NBC announced it will be expanding its
] successful Law and Order franchise with a fifth series
] called Law and Order: RIAA which focuses on an elite
] division of New York police who are teamed with RIAA
] lawyers.
]
] Lars Ulrich will star as a gritty New York detective and
] John Amos will play the chief RIAA lawyer. "Since most
] file sharing cases are civil and only consist of serving
] subpoenas, we had to take some liberties much like the
] RIAA," said creator Dick Wolf.
]
] "Not only will each episode feature a tense tracking and
] capture of a copyright violator, but also a performance
] by the artist being violated," explained Wolf.

BBspot - NBC Announces Law and Order: RIAA Series