GENTLEMEN: just because you are bachelors living alone does not mean that you have bachelor pads.

Pair this with the piece in the latest New Yorker, "The Gils Next Door", especially the part quoted by Jello:

This whole "bachelor" world, with the brandy snifters and the attractive guest arriving for the night: did it ever exist?

Yes, as a fantasy. Now, however, it is the property of homosexuals.

Today, if you try to present yourself as a suave middle-aged bachelor, people will assume you're gay.